Plane Stories

Lots of people enjoy aeroplanes – I enjoy looking at them, flying them and watching TV films about them. However I do not enjoy air travel. On one occasion I was travelling back from America, stopping off at Toronto to see my mother. I was carrying a personal computer and some papers that could not be let out of my sight. I also needed to freshen up as I had just pulled an all nighter so I paid fifty bucks extra and got an upgrade to first class on the US2Canada stage.

Kindly, the sales desk forgot to inform me the First Class Lounge was shut. Furthermore as it was the labour day holiday, the airport was full making it unsafe to use the Public toilet whilst holding secret papers.

And as it was the labour day holiday, the flight was predictably three hours late so I was bursting to go.

Eventually the flight took off, the fasten seat belts light went out and I leapt from my seat to visit the toilet. At this point an attractive but emotionally retarted flight attendant stopped me. “Sir please return to your seat, I need you to return to the seat so I can serve the drinks . ” she said while charging up the corridor with the drinks trolley to block me in. I explained I had no choice - go here or go there, I had to go. But she just barked “Sir please return to your seat” Eventually she called the captain. Whilst I explained the situation, the stewardess just flicked her hair and Tutted. To summararise, I said ” Loook, I can stay in my seat and soil myself or the stewardess could move the trolley“

I just made it to the toilet in time

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